No Half Measures

Life is full of choices and compromises. It is, however, very important to accept that you can't walk alone always. There are moments when you need to hold hands with the people you love and who love you. The rest of the time is yours to live fully. The definition of a full life? There are as many as there are stars in the sky!

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Life had a dream for us

but has she her promise kept?

Her path strewn with thorns

and she has failed us so.

I’d rather die than live a life

of efforts of half measure,

But is it for us to pick and choose

a life of lucid dreams?

Another life, another time

that’s the promise given,

but how can I trust and comply

when this too precious to set free?

Walk along with me,

stay close and hold my hand,

Let us wander among the star

our paths littered with stardust.

But on earth this life must live

till we have enough in time,

Measures of joy and sorrow

our cups burst forth to spill.

Stay and smile, grin and bear

stay close and hold my hand

Our promise is for good

for only in death do we part.

Friends-Do read the post and keep the discussion going

My Fight against Gender Stereotypes

© Nalini Hebbar/openmind/2009 - all rights reserved

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Silent Spectator

I wrote this poem the day I heard we had a deal we just couldn't ignore, for our first property that we had put our heart and soul into building. Just the thought of someone else living in the house, which knew us so intimately, was unsettling. These walls have see it all, lived with us steadfast, through think and thin, through joy and sorrow. They were a part of the family, in fact not even the children knew as much as they did.

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These walls reach out to remind me

Of the good times and the bad.

They have heard the laughter,

The triumphant hoots, the envious chuckles.

These walls have seen the tears

Of the sense of loss and the joy of gain.

They have gasped and cheered

When the bubbly champagne

Splashed across their shiny faces.

A little sauce, a little cream

A little of that spicy hot curry

The party times, the home comings

The welcome guests with joyous kids.

They have cringed in pain

When in anger, saucepans flew

To mar and maim deep inside.

The putty and the wall paint

Will never erase those scars

The memories of deafening silence

That hurt more than the inflicted wound.

They have heard the soft whispers

Of thoughts, unsaid, suppressed

Purblinded by the stampede of emotions

Trampled by the surging egos.

A clean slate awaits me

A new house with new walls

Memories folded and packed

Ready, exited and expectant.

Soon someone else will stare at it

Lost in thoughts of joy or sorrow.

It will be theirs to amuse or abuse

A mute spectator of the game called life.

© Nalini Hebbar/openmind/2009 - all rights reserved

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The Decision

Life has so much to offer. Like high tide that follows every low tide, joy and sorrow always chase each other around in our life. Not everyone has the inner strength to live through problems looking at the light at the end of the tunnel. Some don't see the light at all.  To be able to overcome those weak moments of sorrow with help from loved ones and friends can prevent suicides. My poem is about a girl who found courage from within.


Everything viewed, experienced, rationalized, thought, read, believed, discounted, and debased, as well as all the people met and subsequently loved or hated since childhood, affects people individually.  In respect to such unique occurrences, reality is not a general or universal thing and no two people share the exact same reality. Everything, similarly, is inputted through the five senses, which are, themselves, subjective, creating a highly complex, almost ambiguous meaning of “reality,” even for the individual who is experiencing it.  A person’s self-view, as well as their perceptions of how others view them, has a key role in determining the relevancy or importance of the world and life in general.  Humans exist as themselves, inside themselves, as conscious “minds” and are inherently individualistic. Source

 Humans also exist in groups, ever learning and changing due to exterior events and other people. They also are made up, biologically, of neurotransmitters and complex hormonal systems which affect moods and responses. All these factors entwine inside people to create the intricacy of human life. While it is possible one of these things is more powerful than another in each individual, it is highly unlikely that solely one is responsible for a decision as deterministic as suicide. The causes of suicide are as complex and varied as humanity itself. As long as suicide is considered a taboo subject, the deeply integrated causes may never be fully realized. Source

A million people commit suicide and about 10 million to 20 million people  attempt suicide annually. Suicide is the eighth leading cause of death in males and the 16th leading cause of death in females. Suicide (Latin suicidium, from sui caedere) "to kill oneself" is the deliberate self-destruction of a living being. Crisis in individual or family life resulting from financial factors or from the investments of the hear,t can lead to suicide because of a feeling of extreme helplessness over the inability to control the situation. 87-98% suicides have been attributed to mental illness- mood disorders, substance abuse, schizophrenia and personality disorders.

Some of the Warning Signs include:

• Change in eating and sleeping habits 
• Withdrawl from friends, and family and regular activities 
• Violent actions, rebellious behavior, and running away 
• Drug or alcohol abuse 
• Unusual neglect of personal appearance 
• Marked personality change 
• Persistant boredom, difficulty in concentrating, or a decline in the quality of work 
• Frequent complaints about physical symptoms, often relating to emotions, such as stomach aches, headaches, fatigue, etc... 
• Loss of interest in pleasurable activities 
• Not tolerating praise or rewards.

A teen contemplating suicide may also

• Complain of being "rotten inside" 
• Give verbal hints with statements such as: "I won't be a problem for you much longer" "nothing matters" "it's no use" or "I won't see you again"
• Put his or her affairs in order--for example, give away personal possesions, clean his or her room, throw away important belongings etc... 
• Become suddenly cheerful after a period of depression - Source

The steep cliff rose above the seas

Jutting rocks sharp and cruel.

Birds in nests perched in the nooks

Safe from the stiff wind that blows.

Deafening sound of waves and birds

Rose high to the platform set on the top.

A girl stood there clutching the rails

Her fingers pale and her eyes vacant.

The wind blew her hair out behind her

Her skirt flapped briskly around her legs.

She leaned over to take a long look

At the jagged rocks and the sea below.

Stood lost in thought for quite a while.

Silent and rigid in the noise and wind

She seems to sway pulled by the force.

She lifted her face to the wind that played

Her arms rose heavenwards as she stood.

Tears streamed down her lovely face

Dried up fast by the blowing wind.

Then her mouth suddenly smiled

And laughter pealed above the sounds

Of the birds, the sea and the wind

Her body sung with the distant sea

Her body softened and mellowed.

There was a spring in her steps

As she walked back to her car

That would now take her back

To live in peace with joy and sorrow.

© Nalini Hebbar/openmind/2009 - all rights reserved

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